KELIS is one of the most daring of fashionistas, one of the most recognized hook singers gone solo and quite possibly one of the most resented women in all of Hip Hop. All of that taken into account she still peaks some wisdom on the complexities of women, men and marriage in the recent issue of Complex Magazine. I guess hindsight is also 20/20.

On being cute all the time when in a marriage:

I agree. I’m hot around my home. Yeah, it’s shallow, but I think you’re entitled to be shallow. Honestly, coming from someone who has been married, I think that you have to make an effort all the time. Marriage is hard; relationships are hard. I think people let themselves go–men and women–and you have to remember why you got with that person to begin with and make an effort.

On being refined all the time:

That’s annoying. There’s a time to be a lady and there’s a time to be a woman, and they’re not the same thing. It depends. There are times when you should be a lady, and there are times when you gotta hold it down. Be a woman and stand up for what you are and what you believe in.

On men being afraid to have children with a woman because he is afraid she will pay more attention to the kids than him:

I’ve heard that before. I think that’s a natural feeling for guys, but you gotta get over it. The beauty of women is that we’re nothing like men  and we’re exceptional multi-taskers. I think I can balance being a great mother and adoring my child and also taking care of and adoring my man. It just takes a man that makes you want to adore him while you’re exhausted from taking care of your kids.